Right about now you’ve probably got a sarcastic voice saying to yourself “What are they gonna do? Ban me until the Reach comes out?” Yeah, that’s probably what Microsoft would do with most other games. But Halo: Reach is the most anticipated game of the year, and every person that gets the game early puts another dent in Microsoft’s money making machine. If illegally downloading the newest Madden game early is like robbing the local community bank, pirating Halo: Reach is like ripping off the Citigroup bank New York City.

In response to pirates of Halo: Reach, Microsoft has announced that they have begun permanently banning all consoles and Gamertags associated with the game. Below is a copy of Microsoft’s permanent suspension notice, as provided by a gamer who was banned for playing the illegal version of Reach, courtesy of Maxconsole.

“Xbox LIVE

Notification of Permanent Suspension: Prerelease title play

This email is to notify you that your Xbox LIVE account privileges have been permanently suspended due to illegitimate prerelease title play.

Microsoft expects that all customers abide by the Code of Conduct. The Code of Conduct provides guidelines for appropriate behavior while using the service. “

Nice going Microsoft. It’s good to see somebody taking a stand against media pirates, even if only to further their corporate interests.

The pirated version of the game was made available by Game-Tuts.com, a website that prides itself on being a community of happy modders. According to reports, the original game was uploaded to Microsoft’s website for members of the press, and could only be downloaded once a special review code was entered. However, a group of hackers was able to get past the access restrictions and put the game up for the world to see.

In an official statement, Microsoft representative Louis Wu wrote on Microsoft’s website “Just a warning – looks like Reach is out there in the wild. This time it seems we can’t blame the French; a group of modders figured out how to fool Xbox.com into allowing a download of the copies put up for some press (Ouch!).”

A warning? That sounds a little ominous. But hey, with a game as big a Reach, it’s not inconceivable that some fines may be levied or some arrests made over just this type of thing. There’s nothing that hurts the gaming industry quite like pirates, and I personally don’t think it would be unreasonable to say that this incident might very well prompt the company to keep prices up in the fifties for longer than most bargain hunters are comfortable with.

That said, this shouldn’t really come as a surprise to Microsoft. The fact of the matter is that if a high-profile game like Halo: Reach is put up on the internet, for whatever reason, you can’t honestly expect that nobody will try to pirate it. I’m not saying it’s their fault that the game was pirated, but the whole incident could have been avoided altogether with a little bit of help from good ole FedEx.

The scams were detected when authorities began probing various retailers’ discount clubs for hidden fees and other illegal tricks. While most of the businesses were on the up-and-up, a few, including the gaming specialty retailer juggernaut, were anything but. The probes show that while shopping on GameStop’s website, thousands of customers were invited to join a free discount club, but were then prompted to provide their credit and debit card information for identification purposes. Most of the customers, however, neglected to read the fine print, which included hidden charges and extra fees. “Consumers should be on the lookout for cash-back and other discount offers that suddenly appear online or in the form of a check,” commented Cuomo. “They are often too good to be true.”

GameStop is set to cough up $2.1 million in refunds and to fund consumer education programs. That’s a hefty fine, but it’s nothing compared to the $8 million that the marketing company Affinion Group, which has been pulling off this type of scam for years, is forking over to the government.

Representatives from each company have stated that they have settled and will pay their fines quietly, and that they have discontinued all of their criticized practices. A spokesperson for Cuomo has stated that the probes will continue into the near future, and that these businesses will be under especially close watch.

An auction recently surfaced on eBay for a voice acting role in Saints Row 3. Now before you get all up in arms, let me just make clear that the legitimacy of the auction has been confirmed by THQ and Volition. The voice acting role was one of many items donated to the family of Ashley Ames, who died in a house fire back in July. The proceeds of the auction will be used to fund a memorial scholarship in her name.

The voice acting role may not be a very big part, but you know that you’d be more than happy to be the guy who shouts obscenities as the main character flies by in their tacky purple convertible with reckless abandon. At the time this article was written, the auction was up to the price of $510, with just over three days left on the clock.

So if you’ve always wanted to be part of a video game (which you know you have), head over to the auction page and check your piggy bank for some spare change. If you’ve got enough, you could end up in the credits of a major title and feel good about helping an underprivileged kid get an education.

Trevor Miller was a big fan of MMORPGs. The kid had some pretty sweet characters, with a lot of rare and expensive equipment to boot. Mr. and Mrs. Miller, well, they weren’t such big fans of their son’s gaming habits, but Trevor didn’t really care what his parents thought. As long as they kept giving him their credit card to gain access to his favorite game’s item mall, he didn’t care about much at all. So what did he do when his parents stopped letting him drain their bank account on virtual weapons and armor? He decided to steal a credit card.

The only problem was that Trevor wasn’t a very big computer whiz. He could play his favorite games, but building a complex scheme to trick people out of their credit card numbers was out of his league. His solution was simple: smash a car window and take a credit card off the passenger’s seat. A few days later, a car burglary was reported to the Lincolnshire police.

Higher authorities began to track the stolen credit card. It wasn’t long before a string of unauthorized purchases of “virutal gold coins” was detected and traced to the Miller homestead. However it wasn’t the scrawny seventeen-year-old that surprised the police when they arrived at the scene, but the six marijuana plants out back.

The authorities killed two birds with one stone last week, when they arrested the entire Miller family for marijuana possession. Jim and Cindy Miller are awaiting trial, and are being charged with unlawful production of marijuana. In a gesture showing how important the family unit is to them, the parents let their son take the fall with them on a charge of unlawful production of marijuana, as well as one count each of identity theft, burglary, unlawful use of a credit card, and computer fraud.